Month: January 2016



Some good news earlier this month, as a raccoon with a can stuck over its head was found by some officers for the Manatee County Sheriff’s Department early January 11, 2016. They proceeded to snap some photos, to be posted on Facebook because this is the 21st century, and then helped the animal free from its predicament. The raccoon then scurried off to do raccoon things. Like going through more trash. Chef Boyardee is pretty bad, and so not worth suffocating or starving to death for.

Source: WFLA News Channel 



There’s been a lot about raccoons and food in the news, lately. Which is fine by me!

First, YouTube user Peter Jansen late last year this raccoon was spotted making a Mission Impossible-like heist of a donut from a shop in the greater Toronto area.

Then, Twitter user Ryan Nelson recently tweeted a Vine video (now deleted, but you can see a copy of it from Youtube below) of a raccoon putting what would have been a tasty, delicious hunk of cotton candy (which is called “candy floss” in certain backwards parts of the world) into the water (as raccoons are prone to do) only to have it vanish into the pool.

This lead to all sorts of mental masturbation about metaphors for life and futility and whatnot. Also people felt sorry for the poor little guy. That’s only because they didn’t look into the matter further. For, you see, this was only a clip from a longer segment of a Japanese television show. In the full footage, we learn that the raccoon tried wetting the cotton candy blocks twice before eating it directly on the third attempt.

So there’s you metaphor for you. Try and try but don’t forget to try it different ways. I feel sorry for the people who just saw the initial attempt and left it at the depressing ending!

And most recently a pair of chubby little raccoons recently invaded a Chinese restaurant in the Bronx (by strolling in through the front door.) A diligent employee had to fight them off with a broom before they got into the kitchen.